I took a half day yesterday. Things were not going well in the Land of Karen, and Cubicle World wasn't helping much. So, to console myself, I obtained lunch from Wendy's, drove home, and sat down to enjoy my delicious repast in front of the TV.

We have Very Basic Cable, so the best entertainment I could find was an episode of "Crossing Over with John Edward". Edward is a baby-faced psychic who claims to commune with the spirits of the dead. The show consists of an Oprah-like studio audience; Psychic Boy looks thoughtful for a minute; then looks up, and waves in a very general direction, saying, "Someone over here lost someone, a male relative, whose name began with a J or G." A couple of people raise their hands. Psychic Boy throws out a couple more vague facts, and then decides the spirit is connected to a married couple. The rest of the show was devoted to Grandma Coco (I'm not making this up), who apparently was a lot more pushy a soul than Uncle Jimmy. I bet the rest of the studio audience felt ripped off: "Hey, I came here to try to reach my Aunt Edna!".

Don't get me wrong. I want to believe. Nothing would please me more than to be able to dial up Dad via Edward, the AT&T of the Great Beyond. But I need something more than, "Who lost a male relative with a name that started with an M?" That's so vague. For starters, why can't the spirits tell him their full name? Edwards' act is just a little too fishy, even for me, who's been declared the "Phoebe" of my social group.

Though I bet Dad would "cross over". He had a strange sense of humor and was really into New Age-type philosophy, and he loved attention. For grins, maybe one day I'll sit in on a show taping, and see if Psychic Boy is up to the challenge. If Dad does come through, I bet it will be pretty showy. Be sure to tune in!

(Actually, I think I channeled Dad the other night. I was signing a credit card bill, and I dotted the i in my last name with a big circle, just like he used to. I never do that. It was eerie, I tell you.)