So I finally did hear back from Macromedia, a day earlier than I had predicted.
And get but this: the guy in charge of generating serial numbers — the only person at Macromedia from whom a new serial number may be obtained — is out on sick leave.
That is just fascinating. How does he generate new serial numbers in a way which no one else in the ENTIRE OFFICE can? Does it involve some kind of serial number recombinant cloning?