One of the things I love about reading my server logs is finding the truly bizarre terms which people enter into search engines, which then refer them to my site. Because I have some weird pages, they probably get very disappointed -- the terms they were looking for are there, but it wasn't quite what they were after.

Often, it's spelling errors, usually from people looking for pornography but entirely unable to spell even the most basic words. The two such misspellings I see most often are "brest" and "prono".

It's not always spelling mistakes that bring people to my site. I'm fairly disturbed by the number of people who hit my site by looking for the term "female autopsy", which does happen to match one of my pages. Pretty creepy, but whatever lifts your shroud, I guess.

Speaking of which, one of the search terms that crops up most often -- at least one per day, and usually more than that -- is "milk maids". Now, I know there can't be that many people looking for one seventeenth-century English country dance, so I'm assuming that it's some kind of weird fetish. Not that there's anything wrong with that.

My advice to would-be porn-seekers is threefold:

1. It's a lot easier to find what you're looking for if you can spell it. Especially words like breast, which is kind of ridiculous to not know how to spell if you're going to be looking for pornography.
2. If you read the descriptions of the pages that the search engine shows you, you can avoid wasting your time with sites that have nothing to do with what you're looking for.
3. Hitting reload over and over again will not magically bring up secret hidden images. (I assume this is what one guy was trying to do, because he arrived looking for "brests", reloaded the same page about twenty times in a row, and then left.)

Oh well. It keeps me amused, at any rate. But if anyone knows what this "milk maids" thing is all about, please let me know. I really have no idea.