Singing Potatoes
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Saturday, 13 August 2005
Lukewarm Tea
Uma as Venus

Hillary Clinton, as most people have read by now, has raised a big fuss over the fact that Grand Theft Auto: San Andreas contains hidden content which, if you modify the game by downloading and installing a patch, displays a computer simulation of (gasp!) sexual activity!

Never mind the fact that the unmodified game lets you kill, dismember and otherwise maim people, not to mention robbing them and all sorts of other criminal activity — that's apparently perfectly acceptible behavior, not immmoral in the slightest. But we must think of the children; why, if they should happen to catch sight of a breast (even a computer-generated one), who knows to what depths of depravity they'll immediately sink?

Today, after a few minutes playing around with a demo for my graphics card, I discovered that the nVidia corporation ought to be worried as well. Changing two lines in a text file revealed a pair of nipples under a mermaid's strategically placed "scales" — quick, give the demo an Adults Only rating! Hold Congressional hearings! Throw out your GeForce video cards, lest a child see something every human being has!


Posted by godfrey (link)
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Comments
Uh oh. I looked at the breasts before work. I'm not going to be able to get a thing done all day.
Posted by aeddie on 14 Aug 2005 07:21
How, pray tell, did you discover this? And have you told Fark yet?
Posted by Squelch on 14 Aug 2005 10:04
Well, I was looking in the directory structure which contained the demo, and noticed that it had a "Textures" directory. So I was browsing through the textures when I discovered that the torso texture was anatomically correct.

Renaming the torso's "scale" textures, so the demo couldn't find them, resulted in blackness where they used to be. Unfortunately, none of my graphic editors will write in Direct Draw Surface format, though IrfanView will read .dds files, so I couldn't just edit the scales out by making them transparent.

So next I looked in the "Shaders" directory, and found the "skin-and-scales" shader. This is written in a C-like syntax, so it was fairly easy to see where the mapping took place. It only required a couple of edits to force the shader to return the skin color value rather than computing a blend between skin and scales.

Hmmm, I hadn't thought of Farking it.

Posted by Godfrey on 14 Aug 2005 10:27
It has a Boobies tag all over it...
Posted by Squelch on 14 Aug 2005 19:19
Well, it got redlit. C'est la vie.

Gotta find some other way of seeing whether my server is Fark-proof, I guess.


Posted by Godfrey on 14 Aug 2005 19:56